Podcast: 2 Retards Arguing about Sports – Episode 5.

Ep 5  <——————-Click here for podcast

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30 Teams in 30 Days – Colorado Rockies

Ahhh the 2007 Rockies’ season. Who would’ve thunk it? The no-names of the league went on a championship run. The team that no one gave a chance proved themselves to be champions of the NL. The Rockies had a more than abysmal 2011 however finishing 4th in the West with a meager 73 wins. Can the Rockies rebound in 2012? Will there be a repeat of 2007′s “Rocktober”? And can the Rockies make another Cinderella run? These are the questions that should be at the back of everyone’s minds as we look forward to the 2012 season.
2011 Season
Record: 73-89

Finish: 4th in NL West
Playoffs: None
Top Pitcher: Jhoulys Chacin (Don’t worry I have absolutely no idea how to pronounce this name either) 11-14, 3.62 ERA, 150 SO
Top Hitter: Troy Tulowitzki (Believe it or not but I can pronounce this name!) .302 AVG, 30 HR, 105 RBI
Manager: Jim Tracy
Important Offseason Acquisitions: Jeremy Guthrie RHP, Casey Blake 3B, Chad Tracy 1B, Jamie Moyer LHP (How is he still alive, let alone playing professional baseball), Marco Scutaro SS, Michael Cuddyer RF, Ramon Hernandez C, Tyler Chatwood RHP
Important Offseason Losses: Huston Street SD, Chris Iannetta LAA, Mark Ellis LAD, Kevin Millwood SEA, JC Romero STL, Kevin Kouzmanoff KC, Ty Wigginton PHI, Ryan Spilborghs CLE, Clayton Mortenson BOS, Matt Lindstrom BAL

Now the 2012 Rockies are a new look team from 2011. But unfortunately this is not necessarily a good thing (nor is it a bad thing), along with gaining a ton through a front office gone wild, the Rockies also lost a lot. I would say all that they gained exactly equaled what they lost, which is surprising, usually a team improved from the season before or got worse. Now I won’t keep you guys for a while because we all know what article is up next aka the moment you’ve all been waiting for (I’ll give you a hint it rhymes with Ain’t Trouis Ardinals) but in all honesty I’m not sure how the Rockies will do in 2012. I mean one can assume that their record will be almost identical to lasts, but 2011 was disappointing for the Rockies so I doubt you’ll see them doing worse. They had some key acquisitions that added depth to both their hitting and pitching, but by the same token lost some depth to both their hitting and pitching. Knowing that there aren’t many Rockies fans out there (sorry to the few that exist!) I’m going to have to cut this article short so we can get to our grand finale. Rockies fans look forward to a… well unpredictable 2012. P.S. this might be the last year we see Todd Helton.. that would be a big loss to the league losing both Helton and Chipper.

Prediction
Record: 76-86

Finish: 4th in West
Playoffs: None
Top Pitcher: Jeremy Guthrie 15-14, 4.01 ERA, 177 SO
Top Hitter: Todd Helton (just because it’s probably his last season) .289 AVG, 29 HR, 107 RBI
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-Simple Jack

30 Teams In 30 Days-Houston Astros

Soooooo Astros’ fans… How’s it going? Now I want you all to leave your dark pits of despair and look out at the sun. It’s a new day Astros’ fans, the sun is shinning, the birds are chirping and were less then a week away from the baseball season starting. This gives you all time to stock up on non perishable foods, so that you can survive another long year in your “despair pits”. Let’s recap on your abysmal season.
Houston Astros
Record: 56-106
Finish: Last NL Central
Playoffs: Let’s not taunt them
Top Hitter: Carlos Lee, 18 HR, 94 RBI, .275 AVG
Top Pitcher: Wandy Rodriguez, 11-11, 3.49 ERA, 166 SO
Important Offseason Acquisitions: Jed Lowrie, Jack Cust, Chris Snyder, Kyle Weiland
Important Offseason Losses: Mark Melancon, Clint Barmes 

The Astros had a terrible season last year and I mean terrible. To make matters worse, they hardly added anything during the offseason, granted they didn’t lose all that much either. The Astros will have a better record this season, but that really isn’t saying much. Looking into the Astros’ future they at least have the #1 pick in this coming draft. The Astros’ will be moving to AL West next year, which in a sense can be even more bad news for them. By going to the AL West their gonna have to play in the same division with the Rangers (whom have lost in the world series, two years in a row) and the Los Angeles Angels who recently acquired a certain first basemen named Albert Pujols, that same Pujols who hit 37 HRs and 99 RBI’s as well became the third player in MLB history to hit 3 HRs in a  single playoff game. Now enough about teams with future Hall of Famers and winning records. The Astros’ won’t make the playoffs and they won’t be good. They won’t even be decent, but there’s a solid chance they won’t the worst team this season. I mean there still is the Orioles. So Astros’ fans, as you prepare for your long alcohol and fast food induced coma, think of the finer things in your life, like how YOUR Houston Texans, whom made the playoffs for the first time in their horrid 9 year history. With that I bid you adieu and remember vegetables and fruits can be your friends.
Prediction
Record: 66-96 (Could be worse)
Finish: Last NL Central (The last time you can ever be last in the NL Central)
Playoffs: Maybe in 2017?
Top Hitter: Carlos Lee 22 HR, 97 RBI, .279 AVG
Top Pitcher: Wandy Rodriguez, 13-11, 3.45 ERA, 173 SO
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-McFultz

30 Teams In 30 Days-Arizona Diamondbacks

The Arizona Diamondbacks  had quite the season last year, making it to the NLDS, only to lose the Milwaukee Brewers. Now, the Diamondbacks are back in action and looking to reclaim their NL West crown. But before we get to the present, let’s look back at last season.
Arizona Diamondbacks
Record: 94-68
Finish: 1st NL West
Playoff: Eliminated in NLDS
Top Hitter: Miguel Montero, 18 HR, 86 RBI, .282 AVG
Top Pitcher: Ian Kennedy, 21-4, 3.49 ERA, 198 SO
Important Offseason Acquisitions:  Trevor Cahill, Takashi Saito, Jason Kubel  Important Offseason Losses: Jarrod Parker, Jason Marquis, Xavier Nady, Zach Duke 

The Diamondbacks haven’t missed a step since last season. I have high hopes for this season and will have to retract my sentiments on the Dodgers Season this year. http://criticsfromthecouch.com/?p=390. The Diamondbacks have to be the favourite for the NL West, they’ve haven’t lost anyone pivotal pieces and have added to their rotation. The Diamondbacks also added Josan Kubel to their outfield. A great trade for the Diamondbacks was Jarrod Parker for Trevor Cahill, Parker was to try out for the starting rotation this year but with the acquisition of Cahill, they now have a legitimate starter. Diamondback fans should be excited this season with an infield that played great last season along with a good starting rotation they have to be the #1 favourite in the NL West.

Prediction
Record: 96-66
Finish: 1st NL West
Playoffs: Eliminated in NLCS
Top Pitcher: Ian Kennedy, 18-9, 3.45 ERA, 200 SO
Top Hitter: Miguel Montero, 20 HR, 90 RBI, .279 AVG
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-McFultz

30 Teams in 30 Days – Cincinnati Reds

After a great year in 2010, which landed the Reds their first NL Central title since 1995, the Reds disappointed a lot of people last year. Despite having 2010 NL MVP, Joey Votto (who just so happened to attend my high school back in his youth), they couldn’t even reach the .500 plateau. Let’s recap.
Cincinnati Reds
Record: 79-83
Finish: 3rd in NL Central
Playoffs: N/A
Top Pitcher: Johnny Cueto 9-5, 2.31 ERA, 104 SO
Top Hitter: .309 AVG, 29 HR, 103 RBI
Manager: Dusty Baker
Important Offseason Acquisitions: Mat Latos, Sean Marshall, Ron Mahay, Dioner Navarro, Ryan Madson, Wilson Valdez, Willie Harris, Ryan Ludwick, Jeff Francis
Important Offseason Losses: Francisco Cordero TOR, Ramon Hernandez COL, Edgar Renteria FA, Dontrelle Willis, Edinison Volquez, Yonder Alonso SD,  Travis Wood CHC

There were high hopes for the Reds in 2011 after a great 2010, but with the amazing years the Brewers and the Cardinals put up, the Reds didn’t have a chance. Joey Votto (CANADIAN)! got some heat last year, which I didn’t quite understand, I know he had a drop-off from 2010, but he still hit over .300, he had 29 Jacks and over 100 RBI’s. The real problem lied in their pitching, they finished exactly 20th in the league in ERA, WHIP and SO. It was mostly their Starters, besides Cueto and Leake, their Starting Pitching was horrendous, I mean, just look at the stats, of their 5 pitchers with 13 starts or more (not including Leake and Cueto), their Starting Pitching finished with an ERA of 5.00 on the dot. That is unacceptable. They had a decent Bullpen and a decent offensive attack, but their Starting Pitching lost them a lot of ball games. The Reds certainly went after improving that in the offseason, with the addition of young stud, Mat Latos. The 24 year old right-hander has shown great promise, posting an ERA of 3.37 in his first 72 big league starts. They also added veteran lefty, Jeff Francis (also CANADIAN!), who once had great potential, being selected 9th overall in the 2002 Draft, but was never able to live up to expectations, posting a career 4.78 ERA as a starter, the Reds may try to use him in a relief role this year, seeing as he’s already made 3 relief appearances for them in the Spring. So, I believe their Starting 5 should be greatly improved this year, with the hope of continued success from Cueto, Leake and Latos, and then if they can get improved years from Bailey and Arroyo (who had two successful campaigns before struggling last year), they could even be considered a somewhat dangerous starting rotation at times. Their bullpen should be improved a bit with the additions of Marshall and Mahay, but with them parting ways with Cordero, they brought on Madson to take over the closer role, unfortunately it was just announced that he will miss the whole year due to Tommy John surgery, so they’re going to have trouble finding saves from time to time, having established closer. Their offense has lost a little fire power in Alonso, Hernandez and Renteria, but it should still be a very dangerous offensive group. Ultimately I think the Reds will fall short of the Cardinals and the Brewers once again (despite their losses of Prince and Pujols). I just don’t see this team being able to compete with them. However, they are still young (28.0 yr old average) and I believe that they’ll be a threat in this division for years to come.

Prediction
Record: 82-80
Finish: 3rd in NL Central
Playoffs: N/A
Top Pitcher: Mat Latos 14-9, 3.06 ERA, 197 SO
Top Hitter: Joey Votto .311 AVG, 31 HR, 108 RBI
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-Vernon Smells

30 Teams In 30 Days- San Diego Padres

My dear San Dieagons, San Diegites, San Diegans (Anchorman reference) or whatever you call yourselves, I can’t say I bring good news. Last season your Padres finished last in the NL West, and I don’t expect much improvement. So let’s see how your Padres finished last season.
San Diego Padres
Record: 71-91
Finish: Last in AL West
Playoffs: N/A
Top Pitcher: Aaron Hang, 14-9, 3.64 ERA, 124 SO
Top Hitter: Camerin Maybin, 9 HR, 44 RBI, .264 AVG, 40 SB
Manager: Bud Black
Offseason Acquisitions: Houston Street, John Baker, Ryan Kelly, Cory Burns
Offseason Losses: Aaron Hang, Ryan Ludwick (Both of their top players),  Pedro Hernandez, Wade LeBlanc, Nick Schmidt

Los Padres are not looking too shabby this season. They finished last in their division last season, and I can’t see them improving beyond that. With the Giants, Diamondbacks and Dodgers all either improving, or relatively staying the same, the Padres don’t have a great chance. Their pitching and batting is still sub par and I can’t see their record improving.  The Padres are in a division that is filled with teams that are all going to be competing for a playoff spot. The NL West may easily become the most competitive division in the MLB. With this all being said the Padres are not looking like they stand a chance. This once was a team that was a late season collapse away from making the playoffs. For the people of San Diego, at least you have the Chargers…. HA! I feel as if I should send you all my condolences, first Manning to Denver and now your stuck in one of the best divisions in the NL.

Prediction
Record: 69-93
Finish: Last in AL West
Playoff:N/A
Top Hitter: Carlos Quentin .249 AVG, 29 HR, 91 RBI
Top Pitcher: Cory Luebke 10-11, 3.23 ERA, 184 SO
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-McFultz

30 Teams In 30-Los Angeles Dodgers

The Dodgers had a pretty solid season last year. Their starting pitcher won the NL pitching triple crown and their star batter won the NL MVP award. Now there is one certain problem, they don’t have an owner and are ran by the MLB, sooooo they could become the New Orleans Hornets of the MLB.
Los Angeles Dodgers
Record: 82-79
Finish: 82-79
Playoffs: N/A
Top Pitcher: Clayton Kershaw (NL Pitching Triple Crown) 21-5, 2.28 ERA, 248 SO
Top Hitter: Matt Kemp (NL MVP) .324 AVG, 39 HR, 129 RBI
Manager: Don Mattingly
Important Acquisitions: Adam Kennedy, Chris Capuano, Aaron Harang, Jerry Hairston. Jr
Important Losses: Casey Blake, John Garland, Hong-Chih Kuo, Jamie Hoffmann

I have reason to believe the Dodgers are going to be a contender throughout the whole season. Their biggest loss would be relief pitcher Hong-Chih Kuo (who had the longest tenure for the Dodgers). The Dodgers just 3 years ago, made it to the playoffs and can still be in contention. With Matt Kemp and Clayton Kershaw, they are surely to give any team a run for their money. Now to clinch the NL West they will have to beat the reigning division title winner, Arizona Diamondbacks and the 2010 World Series champion San Francisco Giants. I do think they could do this, there’s no reason to believe that Kemp and Kershaw won’t be able to produce. An interesting backstory is the fact that the Dodgers don’t have an owner. The team is currently owned by the league, so there is some fear of uncertainty. They could implode and become the NO Hornets of the MLB. People interested in purchasing the team consist of Magic Johnson and Mark Cuban

Prediction
Record: 90-72
Finish: First NL West
Playoffs: Eliminated in NLDS
Top Pitcher: Clayton Kershaw 19-7, 2.40 ERA, 248 SO
Top Hitter: Matt Kemp, .314 AVG, 32 HR, 120 RBI
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-McFultz

 

30 Teams in 30 Days – Pittsburgh Pirates

The Pirates have been one of the worst sports organizations of the last 20 years. Not only have they not made the postseason since 1992, that year also marks the last time they had a winning season (above .500). Not to mention the fact that they haven’t won a World Series in over 30 years. Let’s see how they did in 2011.
Pittsburgh Pirates
Record: 72-90
Finish: 4th in NL Central
Playoffs: N/A
Top Pitcher: Jeff Karstens 9-9, 3.38 ERA, 96 SO                                                             Top Hitter: Andrew McCutchen .259 AVG, 23 HR, 89 RBI                                 Manager: Clint Hurdle                                                                                           Important Off-season Acquisitions: Rod Barajas, Clint Barmes, Jake Fox, Nick Evans, Jose Morales, Erik Bedard, Nate McLouth, Casey McGehee, Jo-Jo Reyes, Doug Staten, Brian Tallet, Juan Cruz, A.J Burnett                                            Important Off-season Losses: Ryan Doumit MIN, Chris Snyder HOU, Ronny Cedeno NYM, Paul Maholm CHC, Derrek Lee FA, Ryan Ludwick CIN, Xavier Paul WAS, Pedro Ciriaco BOS, Jason Jaramillo CHC, Ross Ohlendorf BOS, 

On July 19th, 2011, the Pirates were leading the NL Central with a record of 51-44, which made me (along with most of the MLB community) become a temporary Pirates fan. Unfortunately, the Pirates went on a 10-game skid from Jul 29-Aug 7, causing them to fall to 54-59, and put them 10 games back of the Brewers for the division, causing their temporarily large fan base to plummet. Neither their Offense nor their pitching was very good last year. They finished in the bottom 10 in the league in R, AVG, HR, Opponents Average and WHIP, along with a 17th place finish in ERA. Despite posting 72 Wins, these stats will come as no surprise if you watched them play last year, as during their hottest period (Jun 3-Jul 25), 17 of their 26 wins were by 2 runs or less (65.3%), meanwhile, during their coldest period (Jul 28-Sep 21), 24 of their 39 losses were by 3 runs or more (61.5%), meaning they were losing by a lot, and winning by a little. The team was expected to struggle, but hitting .244 as a team, along with having a team ERA of over 4.00 is completely unacceptable. The thing that bothers me the most is when people say it’s okay because the Pirates are young, their really not that young of a team, yes they have McCutchen, Walker and McDonald, but their the seventh oldest team in the Majors with an average age of 28.2 years old.

This season for the Pirates is unpredictable, and by that, I mean they’re either going to be a terrible team or just a really bad team. They made some interesting moves in the Offseason, ultimately, I think their Pitching will improve a bit and their hitting will get even worse. One of the moves I really enjoyed was the signing of Canadian pitcher, Erik Bedard, this guys always flown under the radar due to the fact that he played for small market teams (Baltimore, Seattle), not including the 8 games he played in Boston last year, Bedard hasn’t had an ERA over 4.00 for an entire season since his rookie year in 2004. When I first heard that the Pirates traded for Burnett, I thought it was a terrible move, but when I found out the Yankees were practically paying them for a pitcher who put up some decent numbers in the past, I changed my mind. However, when he bunted that ball into his face at Training Camp, sidelining him for 2-3 months, my mind was instantly changed back. The reason I think their pitching should be improved, is because I think Bedard is an improvement on Maholm (whom they released), I see great potential in young pitcher James McDonald and I think he’s going to have a terrific year, and their bullpen has been improved. The reason I believe their Offense will be worse, is despite additions like Barmes, Mcgehee, McLouth and Barajas, I believe the losses of Doumit, Snyder, Lee, Cedeno, Ludwick and Paul, outweigh them. I believe Mcgehee will have a good year, but I don’t think Barmes, McLouth or Barajas will please the Pirate faithful. I predict that this year will mark the 20th straight season that the Pirates will have gone without a winning season. Hopefully the next 20 years will be better for them.

Prediction
Record: 65- 97
Finish: 5th in NL Central
Playoffs: N/A
Top Pitcher: James McDonald 12-10, 3.81 ERA, 158 SO
Top Hitter: Andrew McCutchen .269 AVG, 27 HR, 96 RBI
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-Vernon Smells (Kalib Tilley)

30 Teams In 30 Days- Minnesota Twins

Oh, the Minnesota Twins, the little wholesome team with the hometown hero and the Canadian boy. They had so much promise, but all that could go wrong, did go wrong. So let’s check out their horrendous season last year.
Minnesota Twins
Record: 63-99
Finished: 5th in AL Central
Playoffs: N/A
Top Pitcher: Scott Baker 9-8, 3.14 ERA, 123 SO
Top Hitter: Michael Cuddyer .284 AVG, 20 HR, 70 RBI
Manager: Ron Gardenhire
Important Acquisitions: Daniel Rams, Ryde Rodriguez, Chris Collabelo, Brad Thompson, Jason Marquis, Joel Zumaya, Josh Willingham
Important Losses: Michael Cuddyer, Jason Kubel, Jose Mijares, Joe Nathan and Matt Tolbert

Last season was a rough one for Twins fans, both of their star players, Justin Morneau and Joe Mauer were plagued with injuries and ailments which led them to combine for just 7 Homeruns all year. Yes you read that right 7! Mauer was under a lot of scrutiny for this, as if he wasn’t really trying. This angered me because the man was injured, and he’s a Minnesota native who decided to stay in Minnesota instead of going to a team like the Dark Lord New York Yankees. I believe that both Morneau and Mauer will have comeback seasons. The Twins did lose their best offensive player from a year agom Michael Cuddyer this could be a problem if the aforementioned Mauer and Morneau are unable to produce. During the off-season the Twins signed a lot of pitchers, this was probably a good idea, seeing as only one of their pitchers had a winning record last season. The Twins had an abysmal season last year, but don’t worry Twins fans, I see a huge improvement. I don’t think they will have a winning record or make the playoffs, but at least this team will be a fairly competitive team and give you all a false sense of hope.
Prediction
Record: 78-84
Finish: 3rd in AL Central
Playoffs: N/A
Top Pitcher: Scott Baker 10-8, 3.19 ERA, 138 SO
Top Hitter: Joe Mauer .312 AVG, 19 HR, 89 RBI
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-McFultz